Jason Calacanis Wants You Dead

Yes, it’s true. Jason wants to work you to death. The New York Times printed a story that says that blogging is deadly so it must be true. Jason has evidently built his wealth on the graves of many. I’m waiting for the NYT to do a complete investigation into the whereabouts of every blogger who was ever employed by Jason at Weblogs, Inc. as well as the writers he pays tens of dollars per post to at Mahalo.

It is patently obvious to anyone with a brain that the in-depth reporting at the Times has uncovered a massive conspiracy that has been brushed under the rug for too long. Now we know why Wayne Porter lost all that weight and why so many ReveNews bloggers are no longer making posts – they are either dead or on medical leave. According to the article, bloggers have died from heart attacks, experienced weight loss or gain, sleep disorders, exhaustion and other maladies.

I sure hope they get this figured out soon. I’ve gained about 10 pounds over the last few years and I’d love to blog just enough to lose weight and not have a heart attack. If I do die, I’m sure it will be in the middle of composing a post, so please have the decency to publish my last words.

I’m not dead yet.

About Brad Waller

Some say Brad created the first affiliate program. We’ll never know for sure, but we do know that Brad has been running businesses online since 1994 and affiliate programs since 1996. When he is not running the affiliate program for EPage Classifieds, helping publishers monetize their sites with AdJungle, or working on iPhone applications, Brad is also busy starting up the Performance Marketing Alliance, a trade association created to represent and build the entire performance based industry.

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11 Responses to Jason Calacanis Wants You Dead

  1. Todd Crawford says:

    First!

  2. Roy, you are funny! Blogging diet..:)

    Jason is a major Troll and a slave Master!

  3. This just proves that big media is finally starting to understand the concept of link bait.

    Call bloggers out, and guess who links back to your article…. you guessed it bloggers.

  4. Pat Grady says:

    All that blogging… disrupting all those extra electron orbits… next up, blogging contributes to global warming…

    Conserve alpha numeric symbols, save the baby keyboard keys and lose weight at the same time, on the new zero blog diet.

    2008 goal: maintain zero alpha numeric footprint, read at least as many blog posts as you make.

  5. FreePSDLogo says:

    LOL this is very funny, well Jason is doing a good job in getting the attention of everybody, I already read 10 articles about him today.

  6. Jon Payne says:

    >> “the in depth reporting at the Times has uncovered a massive conspiracy”

    Now that’s just hilarious! Did Jason force these people to work for low pay, or did they decide to do that b/c they love blogging and this was the best opportunity they felt was available to them?

    I’m sick of the victim mentality. If you want more money go get a crappy job that pays well. There are many of them. But don’t complain about it. Sometimes life calls for tradeoffs. I don’t know Jason personally but I’d think that as an entry-level type person looking to break into web media, being a blogger for him for a year or two and learning about the industry might not be a bad way to start out.

  7. Igor, I think you confused Brads post at ReveNews with my posts at my personal blog hehehe.

    and Brad, Gosh I had no idea until now. Gee I didn’t realize what grave danger I am in. Help, anybody? Where is my friend? Oh no, last time we met he said that he started blogging… Oh my god. Somebody, please call 910 or 912 or something in between those

    🙂

    What day is today? ;D

  8. No, I was just making a joke! I never said you should go on a diet. But you use to look much handsome..:)

    Check out this picture, a movie star!
    http://www.flickr.com/photos/cumbrowski/2263858847/

  9. David Lewis says:

    Apparently it also causes hair loss. [Brad reaches for scalp.]